een doorgeven – a passing on: wensten voor haar verjaardag van haar tante marijke. ‘tuurlijk. awkward pause. je ziet haar nog? longer awkward pause. umm…ja.

a sort of passive-aggressive general confession of not having the heart power to say it to you in person, those brief minutes that you came back, also out of guilty obligation, perhaps, to oversee the painters who actually would not come until much later.standing at attention. or sitting.slumped.just like not having the heart power to say the extent of one’s sadness to another’s face.the extent of anger.we worry. oh, what a mean way to say happy birthday to a young girl!but within these marvels that lasted for days [the ogichan is sitting in a wheelchair at the end of the street], all of that happiness [the obachan bends over in front of him], sadness [unfolding the metal and rubber hinge of his chair], anger [picks up his feet, awkwardly if not gruff], resignation [and places them on the footrests], and love. [and love.] are wrapped up in me, wrapping me, and maybe the dutch say that’s just luck.so as you grow up, this day grown up, it dawned,that,underneath that pervasive body of 奇怪 you were actually just a normal little girl dreaming of true love, playing dress-up and blowing dandelions. thinking of castles.but today there is some sort of certainty that it is the day you were born, years before…so a faraway thank you to your mother and father who helped you come into this world, and, yes, from another faraway and roundabout place, much love to you.the real world will never ruin you, like it has the rest of us. but you exist.