the inside and the outside and the secret of the fear of the fear
“It is true, part of us has disappeared, but reality itself remains. The fact that, today, we can say that the geography of the outside has changed, that the outside no longer exists, that we are all enclosed within, means that, at the same time, the outside is everywhere. But we should have to be able to divide the division to recover what is left.
It is a trap we accept and that maintains the fiction of ‘this totality’ which paralyzes us as much as it amputates a part of us. And thus we are not, not even sentimentally, without strength and courage in our zeal to maintain a worrying normality which we have not really chosen.
(…) this is the reason why what we can still recover no longer concerns ourselves but our remains; I believe this is the only hope we have for simply making use of our lives. For we can no longer separate ourselves from what is incrusted within us. We can no longer lose ourselves, because we are already almost no longer here. However, we can try to abandon ourselves there where we are shattered in a thousand pieces and perhaps recover our outside. and i am not in a position to say whether, in this case, the form does not come anymore than it leaves.” (alejandra riera, enquiry into the/our outside)
(reading through old notebooks, looking for things to hold on to, lines becoming blurry, the summer dissolving in front of our eyes..)
Posted by f | reply »buttoning
gesture study 1: buttoning/unbuttoning (work in progress)
a project about the relationship between individual and object, in this case a button, the stories it may contain and the gestures associated with its use. in collaboration with hiroaki kanai.
Posted by f | reply »lovegang
small exercise, trying out the omni mics attached on a hanger, per chris watson‘s advice (thank you, chris!)
a few hundred meters, so many words, getting all the accents wrong, a mapping of sorts..
Posted by f | reply »frequency of journey: daily (more or less), duration: 20min, means of transport: bicycle
out of the door, you turn right. the first store is the lawyer’s office, the danish couple (or maybe only he is danish) with the big white dog. they helped you when your car battery was flat last summer, but you haven’t seen them since september (did they move away?). next to them, the architects. you still can’t understand what that sign on the window means. they are there at all times, especially the guy with the glasses sitting at the end of the room, looking towards the window. you wonder if he ever sees you going by, more so when you go to the bakery in the early morning, wearing your coat over your pyjamas. you ride towards senefelderstrasse. multicolour fish made out of paper are still hanging on the trees since the kids made them during the neighborhood gathering in the summer. you arrive at the corner. on the right hand, the strange building that doesn’t look like a residential building but you swear you’ve seen someone behind that curtain. you wonder who lives here. on the left corner the new café. they’ve been working on it for so long and it just opened. you don’t like it at all. you turn left and ride all the way to danziger, past the greek grocery store, you wave to yorgos. you cross danziger and continue on kollwitzstrasse. this is your new route. till last month you used to take a right on danziger, but then she suggested that you try new routes, explore the area a bit more. they are still doing construction work and you turn right into sredzkistrasse. one café at each corner. he says he prefers the brunch at the northwest corner, but that’s only because of free coffee refill. you ride on sredzkistrasse, past the store that she is planning on buying (long-term plans..). you pass the kulturbrauerei on your right, cross schönhauser and then go right onto oderberger. the bar that you wanted to go and then you went, the night before she left. you turn left on kastanienallee. the constant fear of falling into the tram lines. horrible images passing in front of your eyes, every time. not so much looking around here, you have to be careful. you only notice that poster that looks a bit like him, as your father pointed out. you were embarrassed at the time, but now you think it actually does look like him, in a funny kind of way. then right on zionskirchstrasse. if it’s a thursday then the market will be there. veteranenstrasse, the fun part, riding down the hill, but you’re always a bit scared, keeping your hands on the brakes. you go past the park where you were planning to have that picnic. maybe you will in a few months, when the weather gets better again. you continue on invalidenstrasse. it’s your other neighborhood but you still feel like you haven’t explored it enough. you remember when you visited that may, before you moved here, the nordbahnhof seemed so different then and you had no idea that you would be returning to that same place only a few months later. past the nordbahnhof, the tricky part of crossing the road, you try a different approach each time depending on traffic. and then you cross. and then you are there. (click here to see more everyday routes and the points where they cross, overlap, run parallel or tangent to each other. and if you happen to be living in berlin, we’d love to read about your daily journey)
forgetting “understanding the culture of collaboration”, propaganda, and a boy that looks a lot like Lucio
after and/or in collaboration with: participants of the ‘visionairs studio‘ (sng tong beng, minfu, konstantin, daniel, dirk, amit, helen, stefan, and sylvie), tino sehgal, michel houellebecq, malgven gerbes and david brandstätter (and their dancers Simone, Eva, Pedro, Ixchel and I-Fen) …and fotini
a series of solos later put together, a one week work-in-progress kind of workshop worked out a priori, a discussion.最后一天，他回答我，“没用啊…”
“and what do you think?” asks the situationist to the audience. a collective holding of breath before the girl that looks like litty speaks. “and what is it that you were expecting from our educational institutions?” he is held responsible. but, “WE were talking about” …something else. we welcome you to this situation. but now she must feel stupid.
regard the distinction. a series of solos that collide on occasion, when it’s a butterfly—–he holds his fingers to his lips—–‘amazing’, but otherwise, precisely unaware of the other.
and a series of presentations about the future, the aesthetics of work and collaboration go a long way. but she doesn’t want to talk about the fear of aging. not right now.
i was constantly in fear that it would be like this. two bodies curled in fear of the infinity of three dimensions turn, clockwise. they must have been over aware, acutely, but he did not like to use the word ‘execution’. a series of solos passing on occasion.
let’s work hard. it turns autumn again.
es ist nur eine frage der zeit
it’s only a question of time.
the inevitability. the irreversibility. the waiting. the hope. the excuse.
explosion inside your head makes almost no sound
walking by yourself, not sure if this is the right way. you asked the two older women but they refused to give you directions insisting that the place you are going to is too far to walk and that you must take the train since it’s getting late. you assured them that you will take the train (you didn’t want them to worry) and walked in that direction. but then turned right just before the entrance to the station. you were in no hurry. and you didn’t have anything else to do. or rather, you didn’t want to do anything else and getting lost in this new city seemed like a good idea. then you found the christmas market (the one he was talking about) and you wanted to go up on the wheel but there were all these children with their parents waiting in line so you just walked away. but you had gluehwein and asked if they could put it in a paper cup to take away. families and children and giant heart-shaped cookies. nikolaustag. your birthday. walking away from the christmas market, you looked at the driver of the small blue car that had stopped at the lights. you recognized the annoying photographer from the opening party. but even so, you smiled – it was comforting to recognize someone in this new place. and then you found the way back again; a way back.
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